the faces of deceit,or…the results of truth


Originally uploaded by jayfherron

I had the blessing of being a single father. The truth is,my sons and I raised each other. The more truth is….my sons and I love each other-we hardly end a conversation with out saying so.
I had an odd way of raising up my sons-I taught them no matter what and no matter how hard…the truth was easiest to remember. No matter how small a lie is-the impact can be larger than you think. I taught them values-that money has no value compared to integrity
I only had to spank one of them once-that was in a frenzy and I hope one day we all will forget it.
To give them an idea what value is in regards to being punished I’d drive them out to the State Prison in Raiford just to show them the future that borns itself in a lie and loss of integrity and lack of love-sincere love.
I hate a liar. A lie can be more than just a tale to change things so they sound better-or to change things to avoid being in trouble.
A lie is trouble.
The truth is so easy-the easiest part is remembering it after you’ve spoken it. The truth never goes away to be forgotten-it is always there,alive!
A lie….it goes away as quick as it is spoken,although pieces may remain-the best of it is already broken. You see-no matter how you approach the truth it is easy to answer to….no matter the direction a question may come-the answer is there.
That is what I taught my sons. They have grown to be fine young men-honest men.

My former wife-the person I refer to as the ‘rattlesnake bride’…was a liar. It was too incredible the things she said when she was intelligent enough of a person to know the truth,she could not tell it-she had to lie.
What is a lie?
Pretty much it is a form of deception on a higher scale-it can be as gentle as a prevarication but even then the results can be harmful.

One of the readers recently commented-more less asked the question about how my brother came to be the one who came to arrest me-how he was sent by the Navy. I have to answer that I do not know-the Navy never sat me down and explained any of it. I had to go on instinct to survive  by the time I reached the ship and the threats began…being accused of something I had no knowledge of. My records prove that-being accused of drugs and possession,and yet I had no understanding of what drugs were. The pressure was so deep that I eventually broke and admitted to the accusations-not knowing what was coming. I lied-I told them of the only drugs I could think of…LSD was one of them-that was an easy choice,the others were glue and some pills I had,the ship issued them for sea sickness. I wish I took different measures then-my accusers (my brother one of them) threatened that I was seeing five years in prison ahead of me if I didn’t tell the truth. It all went wrong from there-I was scared to death and lied.
I have no idea how these things came to be-how it was my brother that came…all unknown.

I can guess.
Somewhere near two years ago my therapist at the VA had an opportunity to speak to my late brothers widow-that conversation validated the things I had been saying in their own special way,the most important was she told my therapist that my brother was a very manipulating man….my dictionary says ‘to manage artfully or deceitfully for personal gain’. That is an interesting definition.

It is funny in an odd way how someone can make judgement on a person just because of what they have been told-and not by what is real…and truthful.
I know I’ve been judged that way.

When I think about those comments made by my former sister in law as how my brother manipulated people I thought about how her judgement of me had been affected by the events in the Navy and the lies my brother must have told her. I see it in her comments….yes,she comments in her other name-unable to come out as herself…but yet,one can see the familiar way in her voice-except it is in writing,that tone she’s always carried with me.
She’s knows truth,but hides it because she needs to protect it…because the truth hurts-often.
I believe my brother manipulated the truth way back then in 1969 to the effect that the Navy sent me barracks D.
For the rest of my life I’ve tasted every size of barracks D-even the after tastes.

It took me a while to realize where I heard that voice-why it sounded so familiar…slowly it came to knowledge,the commenter is on ‘bellsouth’ and that bellsouth is in ‘jax’…and that means Jacksonville. Hmmm,and Carol-why isn’t that the first name of my brothers bride? ahhh,no wonder!! You see when a person is jealous they cannot say anything proper-it’s because they are bitter….it is why you cannot respond fully and honestly-because you are manipulating too,manipulating the truth.
Now why should she be jealous? There’s money-I suppose-she has it, I do not and never have. A pool? No…those things are everywhere and a clorox scent is not my perfume-chlorine makes your body so oily. A new car? poof…I can’t even afford the gas my current vehicle-sometimes stranded here for days,so-a new vehicle is nothing to me.
It most likely is my sons….more so that there is envy mixed with confusion-if Jay’s such a lost cause,how’d he raise those two sons to be the men they are? Good men.

I find it peculiar that a person could stand up for someone who abused his own-defending him in front of a judge,my brothers fingers dirty from his crime…and yet did not come forward to stand up in front of a judge to make the statements she made to my therapist…for truth and real justice-for my justice?
My brother was manipulative-artfully deceitful for personal gain!
And yet-you can be so critical with me here as in the past?

It’s no doubt that your comments have been annoying-because they are as they come from baseless thought.
You stand back and watch me-because this man has only just begun to fight back for was was wrong then and is wrong now…I’m going to do more than write letters and make phone calls to an individuals supervisor-I’m going to see that a law is made to shut up people like the man that joked about homosexuals needing to rape,how hard it was for him to comprehend that homosexuals need to rape…the same ignorence you possess.
Now that I figured out who you are….your comments will no longer annoy me-I just pity you.

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